Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Enjoy the penises
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
