Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
