i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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