THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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