remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
How does one acquire holy water?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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