i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
