I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
