Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize