belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
