where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
