Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
