Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
