i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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