you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
