Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
they need to just BURY HIM!
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
