I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize