the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
i out mim tonsoeep
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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