Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
