My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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