i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
