i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
It's blow job season.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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