What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
