I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
