Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
