so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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