But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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