Sry I called you an 8
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
