he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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