If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize