I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
