I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Randomize
