we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
