when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize