i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize