After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
