I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
