at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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