5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
