ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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