Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
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