'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
