did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
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