I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Randomize
