..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
She announced her abortion via fbk
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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