he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
