Pappa wants mamma naked
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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