the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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