And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
