sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
