He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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