yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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