come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
